I think honesty is the best policy, and value that above all else when dating – so I make sure I’m clear about my situation with any guy I meet
This is probably the juiciest post I’ve written in a while, but it’s one that I know everyone is curious about. Over the past few months, I had a couple friends ask me the all-encompassing question: “what’s dating like when you’re traveling and on the road?” So, I figured now was as good a time as any to answer the question with my own personal experience. Settle in, this is a long one: let’s go!
In many ways, dating when you’re traveling is pretty similar to dating in “real life” – when you’re in a stable location and going about life as usual. People look for someone they connect with, who wants the same type of relationship as they do. People meet organically, at a bar or an event or at the beach or at the gym, or people meet through dating apps (much more to come on that below). On paper, it might not seem all that different.
Long-term travelers most likely aren’t actively seeking out a serious, long-term relationship/partner. Not to say that everyone traveling long-term doesn’t want this. But ultimately, the nature of travel is spontaneous, unpredictable, and inconsistent; and that doesn’t align with what many people want from an ideal long-term partnership.
One of the best dating app bios I’ve read that summed up the situation perfectly was, “Not in your town for a long time, make me stay longer or leave with me.”
Like dating in normal life, I believe it’s incredibly important to know what you want and what you’re looking for when you’re dating. And above all else, to be honest about that! Even if it was difficult, I was open with every guy I went on a date with last year about the fact that I wasn’t looking for or wanting anything serious. And that I was probably moving to Australia , so I wouldn’t be around.
Everyone has different goals when it comes to dating, and everyone is looking for different things
If I’ve met someone, matched with someone, or gone on a date with someone in the last year or so on the road, I’ve been upfront about the fact that I’m not there for long. I’m traveling, and I’ll be moving on.
Unfortunately, this brings up the Catch-22 of dating when you’re on the road: most of the guys who are interested in or wanting a hook-up or something short-term, are fuck boys. And most of the attractive, emotionally intelligent, and secure guys you meet, tend to want something long-term (which you can’t necessarily give them, as you’re traveling).
Yeah, that sucks. If you’re single and traveling, you’ll learn pretty quick that fuck boys exist in every country, in every culture, all over the globe; they’re not limited to one nationality or continent. (And to be fair, I’m sure that whatever the female equivalent is of fuck boys, exists globally, too.)
There are more Catch-22s, too: it’s especially hard when you’re the Polonya kadД±nlar one that has to leave. It’s low-key devastating to meet someone you really like, who you have a great connection with, and who you would want to continue dating – only to have to leave them, and keep traveling. It can be really difficult to move on and stop wondering “what if?” when you’re the one that chooses to physically leave, when your plans dictate the end date. While it’s great if your circumstances mean you can combine plans and travel together – which certainly can happen! – that’s not always practical or realistic.
